


Put Your Troubles In A Suitcase

by Squidapples



Series: The Crystal Era [26]
Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types, Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Very small reference
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-16
Updated: 2019-10-16
Packaged: 2020-12-16 20:36:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21042398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squidapples/pseuds/Squidapples
Summary: A Demon and Fall descend upon the bunker.





	Put Your Troubles In A Suitcase

When it hit September 30th, Halloween was in full swing at the bunker. Orange and black streamers decorated every inch of the bunker.

Dean was sure that Jack had cleaned out Party City. Fake cobwebs, fake spiders, plastic witches' cauldrons, giant fake spiders the whole nine yards.

Every table had spider web table cloths on them, coffins were all over the bunker. Caution tape crisscrossed every doorway making it a challenge to go anywhere.

Dean had come home from the grocery store and was searching for his keys when he heard a scream.

Dean slowly turned around, Jack had hooked up a motion-activated screamer skeleton. After putting everything away, Dean went to sit in his favourite chair. He, jumped a foot in the air when he saw that a skeleton was slumped over in his chair. Dean hoped that Jack wasn’t out grave robbing. Skeletons had taken over the bunker, Dean really hoped that they weren’t real. They could also be leftovers from Blue and Deadly Weapon’s lunch. But, Jack had always been really good at getting rid of the evidence. Especially, if Charlie was coming over.

Purple and orange lights were stretched over the doorways. Floodlights, coffins, skeletons and motion-activated creatures filled the yard. Dean dreaded coming home from grocery shopping, he almost had a heart attack getting inside. Fake tombstones appeared in Dean’s bedroom along with cute ghost balloons. Jack, had a sign on his door that read ‘home sweet haunted home’. Fake skulls and blood were everywhere, Dean was getting kinda sick of it all.

Blue and Deadly Weapon, ran in wearing witches hats and capes.

Dean was surprised that they didn’t have broomsticks too. Their lesson was next week, Dean hoped they wouldn’t practice in the bunker. But for now, they were standing on chairs to hang black lanterns in the kitchen. She had landed in Nebraska, because of a stupid faulty portal. Most likely, she had grabbed the wrong portal device. Luckily, she had “found a car” so it only took her about 3 hours.

Hanna carried two Pokeballs on her belt. Meg had assured her that the bunker was Pokemon friendly. She figured it was only right to bring them. Since she was going to be staying for a while. She might as well help out with the groceries too.

Green beans, Turnips, Radishes and Pumpkins alone with some meat and desserts. Hanna nearly got lost trying to find the bunker. The dead giveaway was all the Halloween stuff out front.

She laughed, wasn’t this supposed to be some sort of secret place.

They weren’t doing a very good job, this place stuck out like a sore thumb. She unlocked the door, looking around she thought of how she could redecorate.

She smirked evilly as she descended the stairs, her heels clicking on the metal. Hanna knew that Sam and Dean were out on a hunt. Jack, wouldn’t bother her but he might help her.

The Raptors raced out of the kitchen and down the hall. Jack, followed them, Blue and Deadly Weapon had a woman cornered. Meg had warned her about the raptors.

She reached in her bag and pulled out their favourite snakes and snacks. Gardner Snakes and fresh Eyeballs for Deadly Weapon. Salami, Beef Jerky and Sunflower Seeds for Blue. The raptors happily accepted the treats and ran off. “Who are you,” Jack asked “I’m Meg’s friend Hanna,” she told him?

His eyes lit up with recognition “she told me you would be coming” he said. “You wanna help me redecorate,” she asked “what kind of redecorating” he questioned?

“The fun kind,” she said smirking evilly “now do you have any sad songs,” she said holding up the portal device.

“Those will definitely do and they’re good songs too, I might have to borrow them later,” she said walking to Dean’s room.

They moved Dean’s room, just his room, not his door. More glitter appeared on the floor, and this time the glitter was demon brand glitter.

It would never disappear, Sam’s room and the kitchen switched places. Living ice sculptures appeared all around the bunker.

Bats and brooms lined the walls, Bacon and ‘39 had little jumpers. Dean’s door now led to the pool, his room was now in the middle of the forest room.

The kitchen had switched places with the living room. The entryway now led into the raptor's room.

The Library and the Dungeon switched places too. Sam and Dean arrived home and walked straight into the Raptor’s room.

Even asleep, Sam and Dean knew that they were dangerous. They slowly backed out of the room and entered through the backdoor.

They were relieved to see all the cars still in the garage. Later, Sam went to research a new case and wound up in the Dungeon.

Sam was sure he went into the right room, maybe he wasn’t getting enough sleep. “Dean something’s up with the bunker” Sam yelled. 

“I know” Dean replied he’d just walked into the kitchen to get a sandwich. Well, what he thought was the kitchen, but turned out to be the living room.

“Jack what happened to all the rooms,” Dean asked him furiously. “Hanna and I moved some of them to different places,” Jack told him.

“Who the fuck is Hanna” Dean exploded? “Meg’s friend, I helped her redecorate the bunker” Jack replied.

“She had this portal device that’s powered by sad songs”. “So, we had to use some of your secret stash of music” Jack continued.

Dean paled, he hoped they didn’t mess anything up. Some of those CDs aren’t made anymore.

One of the discs was very reflective and showed every fingerprint. Dean was very neurotic, about cleaning the disc if he accidentally touched it.

Dean flung open his door and fell right into the pool. He really hoped Jaws was taking a nap or wasn’t hungry at the moment.

Hanna was waiting for Dean when he climbed out of the pool. She tossed him a towel “should’ve known you were into pretty boys”.

“I’m surprised you don’t have any of Roger’s stuff,” she said. “Then, again maybe you do but it’s hidden somewhere else” She continued smirking. 

“Where the hell is my room” Dean demanded “in the middle of the Forest room,” she said.

The forest room, Dean had heard screams from inside late at night. Now, his room was smack dab in the middle of it great, just great.

He slowly entered the forest, dark tan cocoons hanging from the trees. “Kakuna the cocoon Pokemon” “Although it is a cocoon, it can move a little. It can extend its poison barb if it is attacked” Rotom whispered.

A giant bee buzzed past them, “Beedrill the Poison Bee Pokemon” “May appear in a swarm. Flies at violent speeds, all the while stabbing with the toxic stinger on its rear.” “Beedrill is extremely territorial. No one should ever approach its nest - this is for their own safety. If angered, they will attack in a furious swarm” Rotom says.

Somehow, Dean survived the night and during the night his room moved back to where it was before.

All the rooms had moved, back to their original positions. Dean stepped out of his room and promptly fell on his ass.

Every inch of the bunker was covered in thick ice. A giant floating ice cream cone levitated down the hall.

“Vanilluxe the Snowstorm Pokemon” “Even if it loses one of its heads, it can live relatively problem-free. It makes snow clouds inside its body.” Rotom informs Dean.

“Vanilluxe is born when two Vanillish, half-melted by the day’s light, stick to each other and freeze together in the cold return of night.” Rotom continues.

Hanna was sitting in Dean’s favourite chair, reading a magazine. “Who are you and why are you in my chair” Dean demanded.

“Wouldn't you like to know?” Hanna said flicking her eyes black. Dean quickly pulled his gun out and aimed it at her.

“Relax, I’m on holiday so no demon tricks, I promise,” Hanna told him. Dean visibly tensed a demon living in the bunker, he needed a lie-down.

Hanna seemed indifferent about Sam, viewed Jack as her younger brother. But Dean, she loved to torture him.

Swapping out his shampoo for hair bleach, Sam spent a whole day trying not to bust out laughing.

Dean only saw it, when he passed a cooler. The whole store heard Dean’s 15-minute colourful tirade.

Dean stomped inside, determined to find Hanna only to find that the bunker was even more sparkly than before.

“What the fuck did you do to my hair and why does it look like a unicorn threw up in here” Dean shouted?

Steam was practically coming out of Dean’s ears, Hanna smiled.

“A, it’s hair bleach Vanilla Ice, your roots will grow out and B, demon brand glitter will never come out, you could burn this place down to the ground and the fire would sparkle,” she said.

“Who’s bright idea was that,” Dean asked her? “Some angel who wanted to make Hell a little homier,” she told him.

Dean found bottles of alcohol all over the bunker. Scotch, Whiskey, Beer, Dean couldn’t have any though.

Humans, couldn't drink Demon alcohol and expect to live. A little purple thing walked past as Dean was reading the paper.

“Sableye the Darkness Pokemon” “Sableye lead quiet lives deep inside caverns. They are feared, however, because these Pokemon are thought to steal the spirits of people when their eyes burn with a sinister glow in the darkness.” “It digs through the ground with its hard claws and crunches down gems with its thick pointy teeth. Carbink is its favourite food” “It’s a fiend for gemstones, so it stalks Carbink. Unfortunately, Gabite almost always grabs them first.” Rotom tells Dean.

Sableye twitches and makes some kind of weird sound. Dean backs away slowly.

Hanna comes in with some gems “Where did you get those” Dean’s almost afraid to ask?

“The Jewellery shop down the road can you believe they just leave stuff lying around in glass cases” she scoffs.

Dean’s jaw hits the floor, a keystone comes flying at him and hits him square in the head.

Out of the keystone pops a purple ghost “Spiritomb the Forbidden Pokemon” “Its constant mischief and misdeeds resulted in it being bound to an Odd Keystone by a mysterious spell.” Rotom says.

“Who’s that and is he single,” Hanna says eyeing Charlie? Dean had some free time, so he bought a model kit.

He’d never gotten one as a kid, now if only he could figure out where the bloody piece went.

The directions made no sense it was like building damn IKEA furniture.

Blue and Deadly Weapon were running around the bunker in the devil horns, Hanna had got them.

The vibrations from them running around was making it hard to glue the pieces together. Dean had already glued one piece to the table.

Another piece had gotten glued to his hand, and now Dean’s fingers were superglued together.

Blue and Deadly Weapon run through, chirping happily. Dean was starting to think that Hanna was never going to leave.

Every time, he asked her, she’d say she was on holiday. But, she didn’t seem to want to leave.

Once again, Dean’s room appeared in the middle of the forest room. He also fell into the pool again.

A giant snake thing came and picked him out of the pool. “Giratina the Renegade Pokemon” “This Pokemon is said to live in a world on the reverse side of ours, where common knowledge is distorted and strange” Rotom said to Dean.

Just then, Jaws surfaced to devour his lunch. If Dean had still been in the pool he would have been shark food.

“Looks like Giratina saved you just in time,” Hanna said. “Shouldn’t you be lusting over Charlie” Dean responded.

“Jack went with him to London,” she told him. “Can’t you just teleport there” Dean asked her?

She shook her head “new rules, gotta have a passport like a human but, I lost mine”.

Dean didn’t know that demons had rules, he just assumed they did whatever they wanted to.

The Raptors brought in the Fall Harvest. Apples, Bok Choy, Carrots, Corn, Cranberries, Eggplants, Grapes, Kale, Spinach, Lettuce, Kiwis, Limes, Mangos, Mushrooms, Pomegranates, Potatoes, Raspberries, Rutabagas and Acorn Squash.

Dean woke up to find that the raptors had taken his car to go pick up some Pumpkins.

When everybody sat down to carve the pumpkins. They found out that all the knives were dull.

So Blue and Deadly Weapon just used their claws to carve the pumpkins.

But, since they are raptors and not artists, it turned into a mess of epic proportions.

There were pumpkins guts everywhere on the ceiling, in everyone’s hair and even in some people’s ears too.

Most of the pumpkins collapsed in on themselves, as there was not enough to keep them up.

A weird, weed looking Pokemon, kept jumping on Dean while he was sleeping.

“Bellsprout the Flower Pokemon” “Bellsprout’s thin and flexible body lets it bend and sway to avoid any attack, however strong it may be. From its mouth, this Pokemon spits a corrosive fluid that melts even iron.” Rotom explains to Dean.

That still doesn’t explain why Bellsprout is jumping on Dean though. Apparently, Hanna wasn’t up and Bellsprout wanted to be fed.

So, it found its way to Dean’s room and starting jumping on Dean so it can get its breakfast.

“Bell bell Bellsprout” it cried wanting someone, anyone to feed it. “Your monster wants to be fed,” Dean told Hanna as she walked in the kitchen.

“Who’s my little baby” she cooed as she fed it. “Dean, Blue puked in your car,” Jack said.

You’d never seen Dean run faster unless he was being chased. He ran to the garage and flung open the door.

Not only was the interior raptor puke ridden, but it also was ripped and scratched like live animals had been kept in there and it stunk to high heaven.

Dean wondered if it was too late to get in a car and drive far away from here.

Between, Demons, Pokemon, Goats, Raptors, and whatever random shit the universe throws at him on a daily basis.

Maybe, he could find a nice secluded place somewhere away from all this nonsense.

Dean sighed, even if he did it wouldn’t be for long. The raptors, Sam or god forbid Hanna would find his ass and drag him back kicking and screaming.

**Author's Note:**

> Hanna is based off my friend, I hope I did her justice.  
Of all the CDs I have, Back To The Light is the most reflective and shiny one that I have. Because of that, it shows every fingerprint honestly, I pick it up like a record.  
Back To The Light-Brian May  
Will, I every let Dean catch a break?  
My brother used to superglue his fingers together for fun.  
Kakuna-Heart Gold  
Beedrill-Ruby, Sapphire, Fire Red, Y  
Vanilluxe-Moon, Ultra Moon  
Sableye-Ruby, Omega Ruby, Sun, Ultra Sun  
Spiritomb-Black, White, Black 2, White 2  
Giratina (Origin Forme)-Soul Silver, Heart Gold, Omega Ruby, X  
Bellsprout-Sapphire, Ruby, Alpha Sapphire, Omega Ruby  
Working title was Slow Down-Brian May  
Title is a Lyric from Long Away-Queen.  
Soundtrack is A Day At The Races.  
Written for Spncoldesthits.


End file.
